Happy New Year

 Happy New Year to all. I hope everyone was able to spend time with friends and family and enjoy the holidays. 


My family was finally able to go on a cruise together that didn’t get interrupted by covid or opening franchises. 😆 I prayed and prayed that we would all test negative and we would all be able to have one last hurrah before we have to buckle down and get serious. And we did. We all survived. We were able to stop at our four different ports and make it back home safely. Sadly one of my sisters hasn’t made it home to California yet. She’s experiencing the flightmare that has been on the news. 


While flying home last night I noticed a gap in between my teeth where a filling should have been. I also noticed Courtney’s filling between her two front teeth was gone. So here we sit at the dentist waiting to get our fillings re-filled. At least we were able to get in and get it taken care of. 


Assuming my pre procedure covid test is negative that I took last night, I have my port placed on Wednesday. I’m guessing most of you know what it is but when I say port I mean a port a cath. It’s a device that is placed under my skin attached to a tube that goes into my vein. An under the skin IV. Every time they need to draw blood, give me anything IV, and obviously give me chemo, it goes through there. This way I don’t have to get a new IV every time I need something done. I remember accessing them when I worked on the seventh floor. I’m not super excited about it but it’s obviously a necessity. We’ll see if this picture works as a visual. 


Awesome. I got it to work. So I’ll have a little bump under my chest for a year getting stuff done. 

I called the oncologist’s office and it’s official- I start chemo this Friday at 9:30. Yikes. I don’t know what to think. I don’t know what to expect. I did something a little stupid last night and started watching Five Feet Apart on the airplane. This girl has cystic fibrosis which isn’t cancer but it’s still a pretty crappy thing. She’s in the hospital getting treatments and has a port and looks a little sickly. I had to stop about 20 minutes in because tears were steaming down my face.


What’s going to happen to me? Am I going to be super sick? Am I going to go through my daily life without any problems? Am I going to get an infection that puts me in the hospital because my body can’t fight it? Are my kids going to be kicked out of my room cuz “mommy’s tired?” Am I going to FaceTime people with sunken eyes and a pale face?


 OR am I going to be headed to the gym a few times a week? Am I going to be out skiing with my kids on the weekend? Am I going to put walking the dog in the cold? I really don’t know. So many different possibilities and variables. I. Just. Don’t. Like. It. 

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